Parashat Tazria Metzora 5769--Mikveh as Modern Ritual

In the days leading up to my rabbinic ordination, I stepped into a mikveh, a Jewish ritual bath, for the first time. There should have been nothing surprising about the experience. I had visited the mikveh many times before and studied the laws of immersion. I knew what to expect. I knew what would happen. I was ready.

How surprising it was for me, then, when I entered the mikveh and had what I can only call a transformational experience. The mikveh lady lovingly intoned, “The mikveh is the womb of the Jewish people.” She said, “God hears your prayers from the mikveh.” In those moments, I felt an uncontrollable urge to cry. I felt all of the hopes, disappointments, prayers, accomplishments, wounds, and healings from years past creep up to the surface. I felt cleansed. This is not what I would call a miracle, but it is what I would call an experience.

The laws of mikveh and ritual immersion are laid out in the chapters of Leviticus, particularly in this week’s double Torah portion, Parashat Tazria-Metzora. In her essay in the Women’s Torah Commentary“Contemporary Reflection,” Pauline Bebe writes:

The rabbis derived their laws that require an immersion in the mikveh in large measure from Leviticus (see at 12:1-8, 15:16, and 11:36). They rooted the laws in a need to purify oneself ritually after certain conditions such as menstruation, male seminal emission, certain skin diseases, or contact with the dead. Removing impurities was a precondition for coming into contact with the holy, such as in approaching the sanctuary. With the destruction of the Temple, these laws remained mandatory for women and optional for men. …While traditional Jews continue to use the mikveh for “family purity,” most liberal Jews rarely enter the mikveh.

I recently had the honor of speaking at a local Hadassah event. During the event, one woman asked a question regarding Jewish thoughts on the beginning of life. I spoke of the rabbis’ technical definitions before stopping myself. A flood of thoughts overtook me. As I was answering this delicate question, recent conversations with many women who are dear to me sprung to mind. This might be a function of my age, but I am at a time in life when many people close to me, family and friends, are starting families. In the tales of pregnancy and joys of birth, one factor has stood out. Surprised me even. A number of women dear to me have miscarried early in their pregnancies. I shared this fact with the Hadassah attendees and spoke of my desire to consider new rituals to help women who miscarry. After the conversation was over, I was surrounded by women, many of whom had their own tales of miscarriages. The losses these women experienced, for many of them decades ago, were still very much real.

We don’t talk about miscarriage much in public discourse. Yet, it has become overwhelmingly clear to me that this is a common and deeply painful rite of passage in many women’s lives. In Leviticus, we read of the need for “ritual purification” at times of menstruation and birth, but neither the rabbis nor the Torah ever mention miscarriage rituals. How do we respond Jewishly to miscarriage? Might there be an answer in our mikveh rituals?

I accompanied a TBS congregant, who was completing the final ritual of her conversion, to the mikveh recently. It was a homecoming of sorts for me, to stand on the other side of the curtain, to hear another person’s immersion, to see how much the ritual meant for this woman.

It is true what Pauline Bebe writes, liberal Jews do not often access the mikveh. But, that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t. Feminist ritual creators and theologians have created new rituals around mikveh. And, while some thinkers feel that the mikveh is beyond re-interpretation, many understand that the mikveh’s healing waters have much to hold for Jewish men and women at all different points of transition, from menopause to miscarriage, from marriage to divorce, from loss to promotion (read “Rising from the Ritual Bath” for more on this).

In that Hadassah gathering and in talking with other women, I have come to see that there is a powerful need for rituals in the wake of miscarriage. It is time that our community begins talking about these. If you are interested in learning more about this, check out ritualwell.org’s extensive listing of new resources.

What I am reminded by in this week’s Torah portion is that it is in our power to reclaim Jewish traditions and symbols to reflect our own life experiences and truths. This has been the practice of the Jewish people for centuries. The way we keep Torah relevant is by continuing to rediscover who we are and what we need from our people and our faith.